


A New Year's Resolution of Misery

by YuunaFiction



Series: Holiday of Misery [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Dating for retards, Fluff, M/M, New Year's Eve, New Year's Fluff, New Year's Resolutions, Romance, Sasuke is NOT gay, Shikaku has a plan, and everyone else will suffer except for him, because he doesn't swing that way - yet.
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-08
Updated: 2018-03-08
Packaged: 2019-03-28 16:58:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13908330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YuunaFiction/pseuds/YuunaFiction
Summary: Naruto has a date, Minato has a date. All in all, it's looking pretty promising this time around. Except, Shikaku has a plan... and that never ends well for anyone but himself.





	A New Year's Resolution of Misery

**Author's Note:**

> Again, I regret nothing. And let's face it, we've all been there.

With his head inside of his closet and his boxer-clad behind sticking out and begging for Kurama to bite it, Naruto dug around for a suitable set of clothes for the big day to come. It proved to be exceptionally difficult to find clothes that made a fitting statement.  _'Hey, I'm gay, look at me!'_  was the closest he'd managed so far. It wouldn't do though. He needed something better. Something that caught peoples eyes and made them linger without looking overly sexy or casual. A show-stopper. An outfit that brought out his nice figure but also peaked curiosity.   
  
Something that  _Minato_  would like.  
  
_Gods, Minato..._ The mere thought of him forced a stupid grin to appear on Naruto's face as he tossed another plain t-shirt over his back. They texted one another quite a lot. Well, actually, _all the time_ was more accurate. The first text message they exchanged was from Naruto. He sent it straight after Minato first left his apartment. Give or take ten minutes. It was a quick and innocent _'Thank you'_  for the day prior. Obviously, it was only an excuse to continue their previous conversations. He wanted to talk to him a lot more and couldn't muster up the courage to call him in case he appeared stalker-ish, so texting it was.  
  
Minato immediately texted him back, even going so far as to send a picture from the train station. It was a picture of the sign that showed when the next train would arrive. An inside joke from the day before when he'd missed the last one. No matter how silly, it made Naruto laugh and then he'd saved the picture and added it as his backdrop for his phone.   
  
Utterly ridiculous, basically.   
  
"Sasuke! Stop being such a teme and give me your stupid opinion already!" He pulled out of the closet, a pair of white jeans in one hand and a pair of black leather pants in the other. "What about these?" He held them up expectantly.   
  
Sasuke spared his best friend a bored glance before he turned back to his video game.  "Do you want to be a wannabe upper-class rich kid or a man-whore?" He drawled with a distinct lack of interest. In truth though, he was pretty amused by the dishevelled look of his friend and his panic-search for  _'the right_   _look'._    
  
If it wasn't so pathetic, he might have even felt a little sympathetic to his plight. But it was pathetic, so he didn't bother extending his emotional range into  _'sympathy'_. It sat comfortably at  _'I enjoy watching you suffer',_ and he didn't feel an ounce of regret over it.  
  
"Come on teme!" Naruto groused. "I need to look good tomorrow." He stressed desperately.   
  
With a roll of his eyes, Sasuke paused the game, pushed the controller away from him and spun around on the bed, fixing Naruto with an irritated glare as he then let out an exasperated sigh.   
  
"What does he look like, this date of yours?" He inquired tiredly. It was better to get this over with as fast as possible. Naruto was already hyperactive and jittery as it was. Well, more than usual anyway. Where was Sakura when they needed her? She'd be insufferable if she heard about Naruto's fashion crisis after it happened and she wasn't there to solve it. Let's not even talk about Ino.   
  
Naruto bit his bottom lip, smiling as his gaze drifted away as he thought of his handsome date. Sasuke almost hurled at the expression but settled for a frown since he was a bro like that. While Naruto swung for the other team... well, _he_  most certainly didn't. One dick in a relationship was more than enough.   
  
"He's really, really hot." A longing sigh escaped the blond as he continued to smile into the unknown. Sasuke deadpanned, not even trying to hide his irritation from his friend.  _What a fucking Dobe._  "He's awesome," He continued, "The best smile in the world. His lips are really kissable too. He smells  _really_  good."  
  
"Dobe, you idiot!" Sasuke snapped, mildly nauseous, "I don't care about that shit! I want to know how he looks! Hair-color, height-"  
  
"Ooh!" Naruto chuckled sheepishly, scratching the back of his head for good measure. Looks like he got ahead of himself there.  _Whoops._ "He's got blond hair. About this long," He made a vague estimate with his hand, "Blue eyes, tanned skin, taller than me by a couple of inches and pretty lean."  
  
There was a moment of silence as Sasuke stared at him. Once again, as if though the blond man was an idiot, which he was more often than not.  
  
"So he's a copy of you... but taller." He repeated flatly.  _Madara, give me strength!_  
  
Naruto blinked slowly, as if though he didn't quite know what Sasuke just said. "No," He said carefully, making sure his best friend followed him, "He's  _hot._ "  
  


Sasuke looked heavenwards, seeking help from above, only to notice a suspicious-looking stain on the ceiling for his efforts.  _How did that even get there!?_  
  
"Just-" the Uchiha growled in frustration as he stood up from the bed, "Stand back you idiot." He shooed him away from the closet, "How the hell do you even manage to live alone when you can't even get dressed on your own?" A bloody mystery it was.  
  
But Naruto took it in strides, grinning from ear to ear as he hopped onto the bed and picked up the game controller, pressing 'play' and started playing Sasukes video game. Pointedly ignoring the  _'If you fucking die after all the work I've done, I'll shave your head while you're asleep, dobe!'._  
  


* * *

 

Minato impatiently tapped his fingers against his knees; eyes fixed on the mobile phone that sat quietly on the coffee table, unmoving and seemingly mocking him for his inability to keep his excitement and anticipation at bay. He was waiting for another reply. He had just asked Naruto where and when they should meet up tomorrow, but he'd yet to receive a response. Although to be fair, he'd only just sent the message a few seconds ago. It was unreasonable to expect a reply that fas-  
  
_Pling!_

He dived for the phone, causing Shikaku to reel back in surprise and then promptly dump half his drink in his lap. Making it look like he may or may not have pissed himself.   
  
Unconcerned for his friend's grumbles of  _'troublesome blonds'_ , Minato swiped his thumb across the screen, still laying flat on the coffee table and eyes focused on the small device in his hands. A small frowned marred his face as the message loaded, taking much too long in his personal opinion. When it appeared, a smile automatically replaced it, big enough to make his cheeks ache at the unnaturally tight muscles in his face.   
  
_'I'll pick you up at Roppongi Station at 17:00 by the main entrance. There's a club called EspritTokyo around the corner where my friends and I usually go during New Year's Eve. My friend owns the place, so you don't have to worry about the entrance fee. Does that sound alright?'_  
  
Minato quickly wrote out a reply,  _'Sounds perfect! I'll be there at 17:00. Do I need to bring anything?'_  
  
The next message was almost instant,  _'Just you.'_

If at all possible, his smile increased a couple of thousand watts. Naruto was so cute! He knew exactly what to say to make someone smile. Well, more than usual that is.   
  


Meanwhile, Shikaku watched the whole exchange with a sense of troublesome amusement(pointedly ignoring the spill on his pants while doing so). He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Minato so worked up over anything. Much less some random guy he'd just met a week or so ago. Which, of course, meant that he couldn't stop thinking about why Minato acted the way he did. Why was this mystery person so special all of a sudden? It grated on his nerves not knowing. He'd tried to make Minato talk about it, coherently at least, but that was a mission in and of itself. All he did was gush about some blond guy that, apparently, was gods gift to mankind. When did Minato turn gay anyway? Last he checked, he was dating Kushina.   
  
As such... Shikaku was intrigued, and his interest peaked. And now he couldn't stop thinking about it.   
  
It was, in other words, highly troublesome.   
  


"So," Shikaku probed, amusement perfectly concealed, "What did Jesus say?"  
  
Minato either didn't hear the Nara's unfortunate choice of nickname for his date or just decided to completely ignore it as he excitedly replied instead, "We're meeting at Roppongi Station at five. He's taking me to a club called EspritTokyo. His friend owns it, so I don't have to pay anything to get in. Isn't it great?" He all but gushed at his best friend, eyes sparkling and smile so wide it looked borderline painful.  
  
Being the Nara that he was; an idea popped up in his head. He needed a bit more information though, "Is it hard to get in? How many are allowed entrance? What's the age limit?" He smoothly inquired, feigning disinterest. Quite badly, to be honest.   
  
Ignorant of his, seemingly, harmless questions, Minato replied happily enough after sending another couple of texts back and forth to his date.   
  
Shikaku filed the information away, allowing his devil horns to grow a little higher with each piece of information he managed to milk from the poor fool. If Minato wasn't in such a rush to worship the ground of his new date, he was pretty sure he would have noticed his suspicious questions. But as it was, Minato currently had his head in the gutter.   
  
Well, all the more amusement for him, Shikaku mentally cackled.   
  


* * *

  
  
  
Shikaku pulled out his phone after locking the bathroom door in Minato's apartment. Like the boss he was, he muttered a  _'troublesome'_  and then began inviting all his friends into a large group chat. Except for Minato, of course. It would be even more troublesome if he found out before it was too late.   
  
Once done, he wrote out his message with little fanfare.   
  
_'Change of plans. Something came up, and we can't go to that bar in Shinjuku. I looked up another place called  EspritTokyo. It's in Roppongi. Be there at 18:00 or whatever.'_  
  
For the next ten minutes Shikaku, bleary-eyed and unconcerned, scrolled through the long chat filled with complaints and derogatory names until everyone finally got their shit together and decided that; Yes, everybody was on board with changing their plans to go to a nightclub instead of a bar. Oh, and, there was no point in telling Minato, he already knew.  
  
Except he _didn't._  
  


* * *

  
  
That evening, Minato and Naruto lay in their beds, mobile phone in their hands and smiling into the darkness of their rooms.   
  
_'Are you looking forward to next year?'_ Minato asked, nervously biting his bottom lip as he waited for a reply with bated breath.   
  
_'I am, surprisingly enough. Usually, I don't care much, but I've got a feeling that this coming year will be better than this one. What about you? Any new year resolution I should know about?'_ Naruto countered, just as nervous as Minato, although he didn't know that.   
  
Minato thought for a moment, feeling a blush dust his cheeks as his traitorous mind gave him all sorts of images of Naruto before he managed to type out his reply, _'I'm looking forward to it as well. It feels like a good one like you said. Hm, new year resolution... Make new bonds, I think. Do you have any?'_ Then he promptly buried his face in his pillow, butterflies raging in his stomach.  
  
_'Ah, I want to get to know you better. Does that count as a new year resolution?'_  Naruto sent it, face-palmed, prayed that it wasn't  _too_  flirty of him to say that, and then groaned when he began to overanalyse it and decided that it was, indeed,  **far**  too flirty.   
  
Though, Minato didn't see it that way. Safely tucked away in his apartment and away from prying and judging eyes, Minato  _squealed._    
  
Like a  _girl._

**Author's Note:**

> Shikaku ups the Savage.


End file.
